Now for something new.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Eddie" is away at college. I would like to send him a care package to show him how much I love and miss him. Have you any suggestions on what should go into a meaningful care package? -- TRICIA IN SAN FRANCISCO DEAR TRICIA: Send your boyfriend something he can't get while he's away at school. The perfect "I care" package should contain homemade cookies and brownies, and perhaps a book you have read recently that you think he might enjoy, along with a picture of you and a love letter.

My response

I think you will find it hard to provide something he can't get over there. Let's face it, he's living with a bunch of other dudes in a dorm. The only way to pass the time is . . . hanging out at the girls' dorm. No amount of cookies is going to make him stop smearing his face on that chocolatey exchange student from Tunisia No darling, you gotta go hardcore. Send him a pair of your panties. Send him a picture of you and another girl ready to get down and dirty. Send him nudie pictures (you'll probably end up plastered all over campus, so hide the face). Here's a new one, buy him tickets to a game. Arrange to deliver a sixpack of his favorite beer, get f*cking creative. And for the love of God and common sense, don't send him a f*cking book!

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